There are many things to be said for the act of Retiring, but no mere words can actually express the true meaning of the word. Many descriptors come to mind, but they leave something to be desired. I have looked into the possibility of using several short words separated by commas and I have looked into using extremely long words, but they have all left me cold. It seems that Retirement like Love cannot be expressed accurately in ink or cyberink as the case may be. The best I can do is ‘come close’, but in reading the following descriptors, please be sure to let your mind wander into the far regions of the Cosmos, push the envelope of the known horizon, dare to soar with the eagles and imagine the unimaginable.
Retirement is like having your birthday cake ALL TO YOURSELF!!
Retirement is akin to floating down the Frio River on an old innertube and knowing that no one is waiting downstream to BRING YOU BACK!!
Retirement is like bungee jumping into the Grand Canyon with the inevitable JOLT AT THE BOTTOM!!
Retirement can be reckoned as telling your boss to stuff it and REALLY MEANING IT!!
Retirement is like the feeling you get when the worst headache you ever had SUDDENLY CEASES!!
Retirement may be related to having a wild bird land on your shoulder and WHISPERING ITS SONG IN YOUR EAR!!
Retirement is kin to getting into bed under clean, crisp sheets after a long, hot shower, wearing a new pair of jammies and knowing that even though it’s only Tuesday night, you can SLEEP LIKE IT’S FRIDAY NIGHT!!!
Retirement is related to waking up every morning and finding gifts under THE CHRISTMAS TREE!!
Retirement feels like every bite of the cherry pie is the FIRST ONE!!
Retirement is the same feeling that you used to have on your last day at work before your vacation started… EVERY DAY!!
Retirement is knowing that the clothes in the dryer don’t have to be folded TODAY OR TOMORROW!!
Retirement is like having time to drink margaritas every night WHETHER YOU WANT THEM OR NOT!!
Retirement is like watching a fantastic movie that NEVER ENDS!!
Retirement feels like a huge, long, loud stretch and a sigh that GOES ON FOREVER!!
Retirement is related to the feeling you get when you put on your favorite after work clothes FIRST THING IN THE MORNING!!
OK, I guess that is enough for now. If I think of anything else, I’ll be back. Right now, I’m going to go find nothing to do…